"The Sun," said Mr. Bull, "never sets on English dominion. Do you understand how that is?" "Oh yes," said the Indian, "that is because God is afraid to trust them in the dark."
That story is attributed to Abraham Lincoln in The Yale Book of Quotations. (The source makes it plain that John Bull's interlocutor is a Native American). A distinctly less politically correct version was used in a speech at the second annual meeting of the Associated Alumni of the Pacific Coast (no I have no idea either).